Something I found in an Old Journal of Mine

Originally Written 7/11/15 -

To Be In Service to Me...

What would that look like? You asked.

My Dearest Scribe;

Depends on what type of service you are seeking. For example, if you want it to be simply sadist/masochist or if you want more sexual or sensual, or a little of both. I'd imagine you would want to set some limits and a timeframe for how long you want to explore this side of you.

I have the experience and the knowledge to keep you safe which I know is very important to you. Think of this as another side of our unique relationship allowing you the opportunity to explore a part of you, play a role or character where you remain in control, without fear of muddying the waters or to cause the other parts of our connection to fall a part.

We've had deep discussions of great length about sexuality and sensuality and how they are different; emotional connections and intimacy can be inter-changeable. We've already proven we are good communicators and have established a very strong bond. I know for me, in all my friendships and even my vanilla and/or alternative relationships, I've never felt so much joy and peace when we are together.

I must admit, I was so excited when you first took an interest in seeing my BDSM toys and being open-minded enough to talk about some of the uniqueness found in leather/power/symbiotic exchange, dominance, submission, passive/aggressive, etc. The nice thing about using toys is that it keeps a kind of emotional detachment from the other person when they are being handled. Everything is negotiated and hard limits will be respected, or can provide a challenge for personal exploration depending on how comfortable with one's nakedness is or being touched in certain places.

I know for you being vulnerable is risky, but in a play setting you are allowing your vulnerability some lattitude, and rather than being afraid of letting go, you are giving yourself permission within your control to allow someone to meet some need to be desired and wanted. The timeframe is like a comfort zone of when you start and end. I tell my playmates to imagine yourself as someone else and step out of your body as if your soul was rising above to look down at yourself enjoying the beauty of absolute pain and pleasure, and giving over some control to allow yourselt to experience things you may not have been able to before.

I feel like you've been numb due to all the trauma in your life, mentally, physically and emotionally, and that you have not been able to release that negativity into the universe. My hope is that with your readiness and willingness, you will allow for us to engage in a BDSM dynamic so that I may meet some of those needs that are not being met presently. For me, having an opportunity to allow a physical element to our emotional connection would bring balance and joy to my life and hopefully for you as well.

We can set a time limit on how long we can try this arrangement and see how it goes. I feel strongly that this new phase of exploration will enhance our connection but not destroy what is between us. My dear Scribe, half the battle is already won. This is just another piece we share that will be exclusively ours until you are ready to be in a more emotional/intimate relationship with someone else. For now, this could bring some sexual and sensual outlet without fear of losing what we currently enjoy. Please consider my proposal. Let's negotiate what you deem comfortable, and pursue your interest.

With much respect,

Daddy Squire

The Random Musings of Submission

I imagine myself on my knees in front of one who is worthy of my submission.  I am naked, head down, collared, wrists shackled, tightly bound. Ah, the joys of giving yourself over to absolute pleasure, while the music is playing in the background, an old school mix of jazz and funk, soulful and sensual as I await your next command.  I am bound to you by a force not yet defined. Our bodies connected in a way that so few can achieve as others in the midst are jealous of our connection enjoying this moment in time with a renewed exploration into areas unknown; of the moment where our fears give way to unmatched treasures of things we have not yet explored, finding our place within each other’s embrace. Two bodies, one soul, acknowledging a nuance unexpected; finding our way through trust, loyalty and a need to be together.  A physical need un-parallel by anything we have experienced before.  A connection rediscovered as time has no ending or beginning for us, it’s unwavering in its realization that we are meant to be as one. The ultimate expression of devotion I give myself to you, a need that must be quenched, a desire not explained as we move into the world of delight, an absolute confirmation of what has to happen in order to fulfill a deep need never experienced before in our lives as we take a step into the unknown, no fear of loss or rejection.  I exist solely for your pleasure.  I wish to give you all that life has taken from you and revitalize the sexuality you fear so much, bringing you closer to the sweet release necessary for your very survival.  I am a soldier in the battle of unseen barriers to be knocked down and erased to be rebilled into a beauty that can only be understood by us.  Your touch is electricity, fusing our energies, keeping you whole yet allowing you to let go without hesitation.  I will be your anchor that keeps you tethered to the land and doesn’t waver.  I am your salvation, the one that keeps you satisfied.  I want to get lost in your eyes and the ringlets of your hair that are endless, tangled in our web of desire.  Nipples already erect in anticipation, wanting, needing to be taken to please you.  I can sense the hunger in your eyes.  I can feel you accept all I have to offer.  The wetness between my legs unapologetic as the desire comes to its natural expression.  I am yours completely, mind, body and soul.